28w Today.

Hello everyone.

28w today.  It's exciting to say those words.  K has a much larger chance of survival now and her odds keep going in her favor.  As for the good news, I'll attach a belly pic, before we start getting gloomier.

On Thursday I started losing pieces of mucus plug.  Which going by DS's timeline, I went into labor 2w later.  On Saturday, I started to have what I can call bloody show.  It has continued through today.  Not a lot, but here and there.  On the bright side, I'm not having any regular contractions.  I did start bleeding about 5 days before I had DS, so things could be headed in the south direction, literally.  My next appt is on Friday, we're hoping to make to till then.  I awoke today with crazy nesting instinct.  I filled out my hospital paperwork, I'm in the process of packing my hospital bag, and then whatever else I can find to do that will be easy on my body.  I'm so jittery that I need to do something.  I never did nest with any of the other kids, so this is a brand new experience for me.

Also, I keep forgetting to update.  You might have noticed that our little Q has turned into little K.  She ended up having a small name change.  We found a middle name that we are absolutely in love with, so a minor spelling adjustment was in order.  It looks great together.

27w - Frustration and Confusion Over Care

Well, this is not the post that I was hoping to write.  I felt relieved last week when an OB agreed that this pregnancy deserve extra monitoring based on my history.  I honestly believe that this relief has led to a better outcome for me on an emotional and physical level.  I am getting less contractions and emotionally feel more comfortable about this pregnancy.  Well, after this morning, I'm back to contractions, back pain, overall distress, and nearly to the point of tears.

For starters, BP doing well.  123/88.  I'm so excited to see it staying low, maybe we won't actually get pre-e again.  I'm up 15.5 lbs and I think the HUGE dinner that I had last night probably aided in that.  I have started losing mucus plug since Tuesday, so I was anxious to meet with the care provider.  I get into the room and she starts discussing my continued care plan.  It seems that for high risk patients, like myself, all the physicians meet together in the morning meeting and discuss our care plans so everyone can brainstorm and keep the care consistent throughout.  I have started a feud among the doctors.  One half of the doctors (mainly OBs) believe that my best option is for continued cervix checks, early start of NSTs (30w), modified bedrest, early delivery of steroids should my cervix start to shorten, etc.  The other group (mainly MDs, MDWF) believe that I should continue normal activity without restriction, every 2w appts, NSTs (32w), and steroids once I'm in active labor.  They cannot find common ground.  They are also using my MFMs notes on the subject to back up their laissez-faire approach that he made nearly 8w ago.  Neither parties have decided to contact him on the matter.  I'm very fortunate to see him in a few weeks.

This has me left feeling defeated.  And even more secure in the knowledge that base was never and will never be equipped to handle my unique case.  I can tell that they are nearly as puzzled and I am dazed.  I know my case is not common, but can't they find common ground?  If it were my choice, I would continued to be monitored weekly until 30w, when baby girl would have much better chance outside the womb should we miss steroids and then go to every 2w unless other complications started to arise.

After discussing my care plan with this new caregiver, I can understand why they are feuding. Some of the things she said to me, made absolutely no sense based on what my MFM, OB, and my research have said.  I've also always believed the better safe than sorry approach.

I think between laying down and running, I'll choose to walk.  I'm going to listen to my body because I know it best.  And my body is telling me that it needs rest and zen.

Next appt is with the same provider as today on 10/11.

26w - L&D and Eval

I had been feeling off all night on Wednesday morning.  That all too familiar cramping started.  I tried to rest and stay hydrated.  By about noon, things weren't getting worse, but they weren't getting better either.  I made the call.  L&D was apprehensive to let me come in, but after a brief look at my history, they decided to have me come in.  I texted DH and we all met at the hospital.  They got me hooked up to the monitors and did noticed that I was contracting every 5 minutes for about 20-30 seconds.  The nurse, Doc Carter (my choice when I get one for scheduling), and a training physician came in to check me out.  I got the full treatment.  Speculum exam, ultrasound, manual, and digital exam.  The ultrasound showed a long cervix of 4.5cm, no funneling, and closed.  Q has her head right down on my cervix and she is healthy.  No infections, so the Microgel worked.  Because of my history with DS, they didn't want me leaving contracting (For those of you who do not know what happened, I went in to L&D contracting every 5 minutes, but no cervical changes and ffn negative so they sent me home.  I ended up in full blown PTL 5 days later and delivered him 2 after that) so they decided to give me a dose of Terbutaline or Terb for short.  Wow.  That was quite the experience.  It made my heart race, my hands shake, and very nauseated.  I started to feel a bit better, contraction wise, so we started discussing discharge after another exam to verify that there had been no changes.  The doctor (a new shift started) was still concerned with sending me home so we scheduled a follow-up for the next day in OB clinic.

Thursday, I dropped the kids off with DH at work for a quick stop to OB.  I was still getting contractions intermittently, but not of the same magnitude as the day before.  We took a quick peek at baby and her heart rate was good.  She was waving as usual.  He did a cervical exam and found that my cervix was down to 3.5cm.  Still well within a safe range, but a 1cm change in less than 24 hours.  We then discussed the words I knew were going to come up eventually.  Bedrest.  He talked about how we really don't know the benefits of it right now, but at this point, we need to keep the baby in.  I am now officially on restricted activity/modified bedrest.

What does this mean?  This means, I can shower, make meals, change diapers, eat dinner at the table.  This means I cannot clean, lift heavy objects (especially the kids), no trips over 30 minutes to the store, if I can be laying down, I should be, If the kids are sleeping, I should be, pelvic rest, and if necessary to be in the upright position, I should be seated.

I will be going in for weekly appointments of my cervix now.  If it changes again, that will be upped to 2x/wk.  He said that since I'm on the 17P already, there isn't much more we can do unless I go into active labor.  It's a waiting game at this point and one that I hope to win.  We'd really like to make it to atleast 30w, although even 28w would give Q a substantially higher chance of survival.

We'll see what next week Thursday brings.  A day at a time is all we can do.

25w - It was about time.

On happy news!  Nate gave me my 10th injection, finishing off our 2nd vile of Makena.  Marking our half-way point.

I knew that something has been up for a few days now.  I've been getting many more contractions, overall irritability, and something just wasn't so right down below.  I called base to see if I could get in to see an OB and as I should have expected, they didn't have any openings until sometime next week.  The scheduler said she could get me in with my PCM the next morning though, so I jumped at the opportunity.

We dropped daddy off at work at 0700.  Gave a urine sample at 0720.  Waited at the Starbucks cafe in the hospital while we all had a cheese danish and cookies.  0750 we checked in to family practice.  They got us in fairly quick.  My sample came back clean, so no UTI.  Doc threw a towel at me, left the room, and away we went for a sample and exam.  0820 we left with my sample to bring to the lab and commence our next wait.  0920 back to family practice we went to discuss the results.  They pulled us back and she announced that I have a BV infection.  Bleh.  I get them fairly easy in pregnancy, so I wasn't surprised by the results, but am just surprised that it took this long to finally get one.  After calling upstairs to OB, OB again, MFM, OB, and finally MFM, we were able to determine that it was safe for me to use Metrogel instead of oral Flagyl since it makes me so sick.  She sent my rx down to the pharmacy where we had to wait another 30 minutes.  On the plus side, my Makena had arrived a day early so we could pick it up as well.  We finally made it out of the hospital at 1030, ran quickly to McDs for my hungry kiddos, and then onto speech therapy.  We got home at 1230 and everyone crashed until it was 1500 and time to pick up daddy.

On the sadder news.  It seems that the infection has really taken a toll on my body.  Upon examination, non-u/s (so it could not be as bad), my cervix is down to finger width and soft.  I am also dilated to 1cm through.  We're hoping that after this 5 day round of antibiotics my cervix might start behaving again.  I'm sure hoping.  My next appt isn't for another 3w.

24w - VIABILITY! Woohoo!

Hello everyone.  I was hoping to update sooner, but with being quite under the weather and the fact that our laptop got the DOJ virus (for which we can't seem to purge), it has been difficult to find time for an update.

I am 24w.  Viability.  It it comforting to know that she has a small fighting chance now and that will increase exponentially as the weeks progress.

I had an appointment at 23w with an MD.  Cervical length is holding steady at 4.1cm.  I'm up 10.5 lbs.  Blood pressure was 137/89.  Q was head down and probably still is.  I told her about the headaches, chest pain, weakness, dizziness, feeling of sickness, the swelling (especially at night), etc.  She brushed me off and said I was probably a little anemic and to keep doing what I'm doing.  She scheduled me to come back in a few days shy of 29w.  I feel pretty defeated.  She wouldn't even take a look at my lab reports.  I'm sitting here now taking it day by day.  I'm hardly functioning, but can atleast take care of the kids minimally and my personal needs.  I'm increasingly exhausted and gaining those beautiful dark circles around my eyes.  I seem to be developing carpal tunnel in my left wrist.  Although, that was to be expected, I have gotten it with every baby thus far.

This weeks 17P injection led to a bit of tears.  It wasn't so much that it hurt.  It was a culmination of everything going on right now.  I feel absolutely terrible, like the life has been zapped out of my body.  Living everyday in pain and fear of what tomorrow is going to bring.  Disappointment with my medical care.  Upset with my body that I have to have these shots.  I'm so glad to have a husband that completely understands.  I will feel relieved when she is here and we can officially close this chapter in our lives.  I cannot handle another pregnancy, physically or emotionally.

On the bright side.  Here is my 24w belly pic.  :)  I've grown a lot in 4w.

22w Update

Usually, I update after an appointment.  It was scheduled for Thursday, but it turns out that the hospital has a complete power outage and needed to reschedule everyone.  Unfortunately, that means I won't be able to see a doctor until this coming Friday.

We went back to our hometown for a quick trip for a wedding.  Everything went very well.  On the way back, I started swelling.  Of course, I figured that it was probably just traveling back home and with having my blood pressure checked, it was normal.  It seemed to go down.  It was short lived.  I was getting anxious to see my doctor on Thursday to discuss the way I have been feeling.

I ended up getting b/w done on Friday which came back showing hemolysis, but everything else checked out.  Iron serum fantastic though.  Platelets in a safe range.  LFT normal.

Over the weekend my blood pressure has gotten to 120/85, which is a 20/15 increase for me.  I'm swollen.  I keep waking up all night because of how much pain the swelling in causing me.  I can feel my face is a little bit swollen and so are my lips.  Just in the past night I started feeling like I'm getting the flu.  Constant burning in my chest, especially under my ribcage.  I'm just not feeling well.  I'm hoping that the doc orders a new round of labs on Friday and I can compare for any changes.  My dipstick tests have come back at negative for proteinuria.

23w tomorrow.  I'll feel relieved to make it to 24w and even happier with 26w and beyond.

An exciting day, 20w!

Today has been a very eventful day for us and marked full of milestones.

To start with the beginning of the day.  We are officially 20w.  Half way done and I'm finding it hard to believe that DD2 could be here in 17w.  I honestly think that I'll be one of those women that the first 17P dose that she misses that she goes into labor.  This also marks the day that I officially go to L&D for any complications and they will attempt to stop my labor.  My 20w belly pic.  I feel like I'm showing so obviously right now, but I guess it's just a tiny little thing yet.

DH gave me my 5th injection today which marks our first vile of Makena gone and only four to go.  He did really well and surprisingly I'm minimally sore. I'll probably be feeling it tomorrow though.  Bleh.  The picture below is of our shot set-up for anyone interested.  The first needle is to draw out the medication and the second is to inject.  You can also see our lovely Vlasic needle jar.  I think we might be able to fill it for another vile before needing a new one.

We also had our Level II scan with the MFM today.  I am officially up 4.6 lbs.  Baby girl looks absolutely great.  She was measuring 20w2d on everything and approximate weight of 13oz.  She is sitting exactly how I thought she was.  Her butt to my left and her head to my right, with her back to my belly.  She also had her hand waving near my cervix as usual to say "hello!".  Cervix is back up to 4.1cm so we got the go ahead to leave tomorrow on our week trip.  Yay.  Dr. B is also so confident in this pregnancy that he feels he doesn't need to see us again until 30w.  I think that's fair, especially since everything started to hit the fan around then anyways.  I had trace protein in my urine, but that's nothing to be too worried about.  I think I am a bit dehydrated from the yard work we did yesterday.  So far I feel goo an excited/relieved to count the weeks down.  The top picture is of her in the fetal position.  Her feet are above her head.